


It's the Climb

by Writer_Geekgirl



Series: Castiel and Dean: A Love Story [22]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2017-10-28
Packaged: 2019-01-25 09:07:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12527872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writer_Geekgirl/pseuds/Writer_Geekgirl
Summary: Dean makes a mistake with a girl in a bar that almost destroys his and Castiel's growing relationship.





	It's the Climb

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place in the same universe as the other stories in the Castiel and Dean: A Love Story series series.
> 
> This story was written in response to the prompt word: climb.
> 
> My apologies for derailing my happy and fluffy set of stories. I started to write this as I watched episode 13x03 of Supernatural, and I was mad at Dean for his final conversation with Sam in that episode. I'm still mad at Dean. He was an assbutt. 'Nuff said.

When Jody and Claire each called for help with a hunt in different locations, Castiel, Dean, and Sam had to split up. Sam and Castiel helped Claire with a vampire nest in Cloudcroft, New Mexico, while Dean helped Jody and Alex with a vengeful spirit in Omaha, Nebraska. After finishing the missions, the trio planned to meet in Colorado to investigate a string of gruesome murders in the national forest that they thought might be a Chupacabra. 

Dean arrived in the city on the outskirts of Boulder first. The plan was for Castiel and Sam to meet him at a hotel, but Sam spied the Impala at a bar a couple of miles away from it. Sam pointed out the car to Cas, "Cas, look, I think we know where to find Dean."

Castiel pulled the Firebird into the bar's parking lot and parked it next to the Impala. He had missed Dean in the week they had been apart. Castiel and Sam walked into the bar. Once their eyes adjusted to the dim, smoke-filled bar, Castiel saw Dean in a booth in a dark corner of the bar, kissing a blonde woman. Another woman was on his other side, her hand rubbing Dean's knee.

Castiel froze in his tracks. A jumble of emotions filtered through him. 

Sam looked at Castiel surprised for a minute, and then turned to face where Castiel was staring. Sam growled, "That son of a bitch." Sam started to head to the booth, his body radiating with anger.

Castiel turned and fled to the Firebird. He peeled tires as he drove the car out of the parking lot back to the highway. He was trying to rationalize what he had seen at the bar but couldn't come up with a plausible scenario. Castiel felt guilty about leaving Sam at the bar without saying anything, but he had to get out of there before he saw more. Castiel pressed the accelerator of the Firebird down harder as he started the climb up the mountain. 

He felt numb. The road started getting extremely curvy, but Castiel drove with precision and skill mindlessly. His cellphone rang. He glanced it and saw it was Sam. He ignored the call. He lost track of time as he drove. He finally pulled the Firebird off the main highway to a side road. He followed the road until it came to a scenic overlook. He parked the Firebird and got out to stare at the vista. 

Mountain after mountain appeared before him, capped in snow. Castiel loosened his tie and pulled it off. He tossed it over the side of the overlook. He watched it fall slowly over the side. He shrugged off his trench coat. He held it over the cliff, but hesitated. The coat billowed in the wind. He stared at it take on a life of its own as the wind pulled it back and forth as if it was a flag. He took a deep breath and let go of it, but didn't watch it fall.

He backed away from the edge fell to his knees and then sat on the ground. Ishim had once said all he had was two poorly trained monkeys and a ratty trench coat. Now, he had nothing. 

He could hear the phone ringing in the car again, but he ignored it. He knew that Sam would fight Dean on his behalf, but the faster he got out of the picture, the faster the brothers would stop fighting. He didn't want to come between the brothers, no matter what Dean did. He climbed to his feet.

He left the Firebird behind and started following a trail up the mountain. When he got to a point he could climb no further up, he sat down. Tears came then. He curled in a ball in a bed of pine cone needles. He closed his eyes.

\---------

After yanking Dean out of the booth and pulling him forcibly out of the bar, Sam faced Dean with his eyes glinting in anger, "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't thinking, Sam. She came up and said the guy was harassing her and asked if she and her friend could pretend to be with me, so he'd lose interest and leave. I put my arm around her just to act cozy, next thing I know she's trying to give me a tongue massage and her friend is trying to feel her way up my leg."

"You thought you could get away with something because Cas and I weren't with you? Are you reverting back to your old ways?" Sam snarled.

"It wasn't like that, Sam. I was about to leave them. I wasn't there to meet them."

Sam pulled out his phone and dialed Castiel's number. After a moment, he hung up. Sam sighed, "Well, Cas isn't picking up his phone. I'll pull up the tracking app."

Dean pulled back and punched the wall repeatedly until his knuckles were raw and bleeding. He walked around the corner of the bar. He softly prayed, "Cas, can you hear me? I haven't needed to do this for a long time. It feels weird to be praying to you again. Please, call me. I'm sorry. Please. I'm begging you. Come back."

\-----

Sam located Castiel's cellphone in the national park on his laptop. He drove the Impala, because he wasn't sure that Dean was sober enough or in the right frame of mind. They arrived where the Firebird was parked, but saw no sign of Castiel. The cellphone was on the front seat of the car. Sam approached the edge of the drop off. He saw the tan of the trench coat on the rocks below. He let out an audible gasp. 

"What, Sammy?" Dean started to approach the edge. 

"Stay back, Dean. Sit in the car a minute." Sam went to the car and got binoculars out of the trunk. He focused in on the coat and was relieved to realize that the coat didn't have a body with it.

"Cas' coat is down there, but he's not. It's okay, Dean. He can't be far." Dean stood in stunned silence, while Sam paced the perimeter of the parking lot for any clues about which way Castiel might have headed.

A few minutes later, Castiel staggered out of the woods. He looked tired with pine needles mixed in his tousled hair and suit jacket. He stopped short when he saw Sam and Dean. In his deep, gravelly voice, he said, "I heard your call, Dean. I promised to always come when you call. Unlike some, I keep my promises. "

Sam went and sat in the Impala and turned on some music to give them privacy. He still watched them so he could intervene, if necessary.

"Cas, what you saw back there wasn't what you thought you saw. Well, it was, but it wasn't intentional." Dean paused, wondering how to explain what happened.

Castiel said tiredly, "It's fine, Dean. Whatever you do is fine. I overreacted." Castiel slid down against the door of the Firebird until he was sitting on the ground with his back against the car door. "Our relationship isn't enough for you. That's fine. I'm not human. I'll play whatever role you want. Just tell me the rules. " 

Dean looked at him in stunned silence. "You think I'm playing some sort of game with you, Cas?"

"It's just whenever I finally think I have everything figured out, I realize I know nothing at all. I thought I understood, but I don't."

"I made a mistake, Cas. I'm sorry. You are right to be angry. I screwed up. I do that sometimes."

Castiel rested his chin on his knees and wrapped his arms around his legs. He looked up at Dean, "Tell me what I'm supposed to feel, Dean." 

Dean sat in front of him on the ground, facing him. "Well, you could feel hurt and betrayed. You could feel angry. You could want to kick my ass. Sam does. I think he loves you more than me."

"I'm sorry, Dean. He shouldn't."

"Why not? You're more loveable than me. I'm a borderline alcoholic with so many psychological issues that I should be someone's case study. I've yelled at you so many damn times when all you were trying to do the best you could do at the time." Dean reached out to touch Castiel's hand, but Castiel pulled his hand out of reach.

"Dean, I love you. I just don't understand relationships. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't like what I'm feeling right now."

Dean sighed. "You are having very humanlike emotions, Cas. I screwed up and hurt you. I didn't mean to, I didn't go looking for that. I promise it was just that kiss."

"I'm being ridiculous."

"Cas, you're my end game, you know that? I love you. I want to be with you and only you. I just screwed up. What's ironic is, I was drinking in the bar to get the courage to give you this." Dean pulled a small box out of his pocket. 

Castiel looked at him confused. Dean handed him the box. Castiel opened it and looked at the ring inside. He looked back at Dean with a questioning stare.

"Sam made that crack about the brother-in-law label a few weeks back and it got me to thinking, I want you to have that label. But like most things, I managed to screw up an epically planned proposal."

Castiel didn't say a word and continued to stare at the box. He didn't look at Dean as he said, "I threw my trench coat over the cliff."

"I know. I think you almost caused Sam to have a heart attack."

"I didn't mean to distress him."

Dean shook his head, "No, Cas, this is all on me. As for rules, that's what vows are about. To have and to hold from this day forward shit."

Castiel snapped the box shut and handed it back to Dean.

Dean's heart fell. "Are you saying…"

"I'm saying that you are going to have to go through with your epically planned proposal when I'm not sitting here covered in pine needles, you don't smell like some woman's perfume, and when Sam isn't about ready to pee in your car because he's afraid to come out if it. I love you, assbutt." 

Dean stood up and offered a hand to Castiel. Castiel took his hand, and was pulled into a long hug.

Sam opened the Impala's door, "Guys, can I…"

"Go find some bushes, Sammy." 

Sam retreated out of sight. 

Castiel looked into Dean's eyes. "The other problem. My car keys are in the trench coat."

Dean pulled out the spare key that he carried for the Firebird out of his wallet. 

"I will need a new trench coat."

"You really don't. I can't watch your ass in jeans when you wear the trench coat."

Castiel looked at him sternly. 

"Compromise? I buy you both a trench coat and a bomber jacket so I can watch your ass half the time?" Castiel gave a small shrug of his shoulders.

"I love you, Cas."

"Assbutt."


End file.
